Reflecting on the ocean

Before I jump into where I am and how I am I would like to start off with a little quote from two of my students this past week. Honestly... they never cease to surprise me with what can come out of their mouths.

M: "Ms. Vermeer! S just insulted my generation!"

Me: "S, why did you insult her?"

S: "She insulted my generation first!"

Me: pause... "Ok, wait a minute... what did you two just say?"

S: "She insulted my generation!"

Me: "Do you two even know what you are saying? Go back to your seats, you are not allowed to speak to each other the rest of the afternoon."

As I write to you this evening, I am sitting in a dear friend's condo on the beach in Grand Cayman. Spring break started exactly 26 hours ago and after getting up at 3am to fly out here I am finally settling in to enjoy every second that I can. When I walked into the condo I instantly ran out to the porch and starred at the ocean. It is so big and powerful. The moment I see the ocean I am always hit by the fact that it is so massive and I am so small.

The ocean constantly puts life into a little more perspective for me. I realize that my worries and my "troubles" are so small in the giant scheme of things. God is like a mighty powerful ocean that relentlessly pushes me each day just like the oceans waves beat in and out on the crumbling sand. God is the one that is in control, I am not. It is funny how in my normal day to day grind I forget this. I get caught up in the lists of things I have to get done and the students I have to help get on grade level. The task seems daunting, but the pressure I put on myself is simply imploding.

The education gap is not just simply something that I read about in the papers or hear on the news, it is a daily reality in my classroom. It is a perpetual stabbing in my side, reminding me each day that I must become the bridge for this gap with my students. I stand in front of them and realize day in and out that they are looking to me to be their answer. They are looking to me to help erase their gap. As a first grade teacher I already see a gap with my own students. Some are reading at a third grade level, and others cannot read simple words like up or had. Could you even imagine how massive this gap grows to be by the time a student is in junior high?

Today President Obama stepped up and said that major changes need to be made in No Child Left Behind. I agree, but what are the answers? How do we go about making a positive change putting our STUDENTS' needs first and not our own selfish ambition? It is my hope that Arnie Duncan and those on capital hill are able to sit down and consider what they need to do so that the 18 students in my room and millions of students around the country can have a dream and a hope for the future and truly believe without a doubt that they can achieve it.